Updated: Sep 13, 2022
Perhaps you were raised by parents who taught you how to give to others... and that's an amazing quality to embody. However, if you find it hard to put your Self first then maybe it's time to break that toxic cycle of endless 'giving', so that when you are able to 'give' to others it comes from a place of awareness and love.
Giving to others
I came from a place where I was always thinking about others and struggled to learn and understand my own needs and care for my Self. When you're living in that cycle, it's leads to resentment and regret - because you've failed to meet your own needs first. You end up giving all your time and energy to others and have nothing left to give to your Self. This unhealthy pattern leads you to blame and resent your Self and impacts the relationships in your life, as this blame trickles out to the people you're giving to.
We're in control
When you think about it - it's our own fault because we failed to show up for ourselves before commiting to others. The good news is - we're the ones who can change it by setting healthy boundaries.
Transforming childhood beliefs
It was a massive transformation for me to let go of this ego part of my identity when I had to deconstruct and rebuild my conditioning of giving to others by first giving to my Self. And, although I'm grateful for the way my parents have raised me... I just needed to let go of the guilt of putting my Self first and accept that it's okay to be Selfish if it enables me to show up better when I do for those around me.
It's up to us, as adults to put ourselves first, so that we can come to others with our time and energy - with presence and self-awareness.
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