• divyachandegra

We’re Ruining Our Kids Through Our Conditions of Good and Bad

Updated: Oct 29, 2021


Let’s start becoming aware of placing our conditions on future generations.


Where does ‘good’ or ‘bad’ come from?

Children are born innocent without an understanding or structure of ‘good’ and ‘bad’. It’s us, as adults and caregivers who instil the conditions and concept of what’s considered ‘good’ and ‘bad’ in our children. And, whose spectrum do we use? We repeat the cycles of our upbringing by pushing our children to conform to the structures of ‘good’ and ‘bad’ that we were raised within.


The nature of children

Innately, children are pure and full of wonderment. Children, naturally have a high vibration and therefore it follows that they would be in alignment with Source and their true Authentic Self. That is… before we push our low vibrational fears, illusions, conditions and trauma upon them in the name of protecting them from their experiences.


It’s adults living unconsciously, who condition children into living in certain structures and especially the validation-seeking ones of ‘good’ and ‘bad’.


Forming associations in childhood

Children often act out when they want attention, right? So, they behave in a way that their parents may have previously reprimanded them for. Their associations have formed where ‘good’ is when parents are happy, or I do as I’m told because this means I am loved versus parents getting angry or upset when I do not do as I’m told, or when my parents are tired, so I can probably get what I now know is ‘bad’ for me.


Our words, actions, behaviours

How about if we didn’t react to what we consider is ‘good’ or ‘bad’ behaviour for a child and just let them be and have their own experiences? Then they wouldn’t need to test our boundaries and spend their lives oscillating between seeking validation or acting in fear of losing their parents’ love and affection. What if we instil in our children with our words, actions and behaviours that they will always be loved instead of making them adhere to ideas of what ‘good’ or ‘bad’ look like to us because of our conditions?


The future of our society

All of us have been given a gift in raising future generations for the wellbeing of humankind, the animal kingdom and our environment. The way children are raised is vital to the type of future they and our planet will have.


The meaning behind ‘good’ and ‘bad’ is worthless. Language is so simple that it cannot explain the complexities of each individual’s experience for them to have developed the concept of what good means vs bad.


These concepts exist because, we as adults have had them ingrained in us since our childhood and through no fault of their own - our parents have had them ingrained since their childhoods. It’s generational, societal and economic conditioning that we need to wake up to so that we can make conscious choices to change the way of our society. And so, instead of questioning what we teach children when we become parents, caregivers and role models – our comfort zone for this new phase in life often leads us to the subconscious (default) behaviours of how our parents raised us. These patterns need to be broken so that we can minimise the conditional structures we put in place with future generations through living unconsciously and instead start to live with awareness.


Children learn from us

Let’s think about it – an innocent toddler who just wants to play, takes out all of the toys and happens to make a mess. The parent gets stressed out, the child feels that vibration and eventually the parent takes it out on the child by reacting – whether through their own energy (children pick up on energies like all other animate beings and inanimate objects), non-verbal cues and emotional states – the child starts learning… The child learns all of the occasions when said parent / caregiver gets angry, sad, fearful, stressed, happy, delighted, excited, because of messy rooms, smelly nappies, lack of self-care, low patience or tolerance levels and also begins to assign conditions of love, attention, value, worth and respect within the lenses of the parents’ conditioning.


If I eat my food, my parents will be happy. If I tidy my toys then my caregivers will think ‘I’m a good girl’. When I don’t share with my siblings, I’m ‘bad’ or ‘naughty.’


Conditional structures

What our conditional structures do well is remove the innocence and inquisitiveness from our children. We do not allow the children to form or find or be at one with their true nature. Later, everyone has a mid-life crisis when they realise, they don’t really know who they are because they’ve been living in false truths and false belief structures for 30 to 40 years. We let our children develop through our conditions, instead of being authentically themselves.


Be the change

Instead of trying to raise ‘good’ or ‘bad’ children – whatever that means when society labels children as good or bad, we need to start addressing the underlying structures around the words, so that we can start to consciously create new habits and behaviours to minimise the work the children of our future generations will need to do on themselves to free themselves from our conditions and confinement of good and bad.


There is no good or bad. There is only the associated behaviour, language and expectations that our parents and their parents put on us to place us in boxes of order and structure instead of playing free and in alignment with our true nature and source guidance for fear that someone might label their child as ‘bad’.


How about we let them have their own experiences and aim to be the best guides for them, without blocking them or bringing them in to continue the cycles with our conditions...


Sign up to get instant access to my free 40-min Unblock Your Self Masterclass >


Subscribe for more like this and my free weekly wellness tips – I’m planting trees for new sign ups on my website >>


Check out my related posts for more!


With Love,


Divya


My mission is to be of service to our community, future generations and our environment through conscious living.


#wellness #balance #holistichealth #releaseyourprograms #emotionalwellness #mentalwellness #mentalhealth #holisticwellness #consciousliving #spiritualwellness #selfawarenessjourney #tacklingfears #letgooffears #releaseyourfears #conditionalstructures #breakthecycle #breakingcycles #healingpastconditions #healingchildhoodtrauma #breakinghabits #success #childhoodassociations #goodandbad